Counselling after the Loss of a Baby

What is counselling?

Most people feel upset and sad at different times in their lives.  Usually they are able to cope, with time and help from family and friends.

However, you may find you are not able to cope by yourself and talking to someone independent (not family or friends) may help. This is called counselling. Losing a baby can be one of those difficult times, where counselling can help.

What is a counsellor?

A counsellor is someone who has training and experience in working with people who are going through a hard time in their life.

The hospital counsellor has special training in working with people who have lost a baby.

Why would I need to see a counsellor?

The hospital counsellor can see people if they are going through any of the situations below:

• Miscarriage
• Stillbirth
• Termination of pregnancy
• Ectopic pregnancy
• Sudden death of a child.

Everyone is different and deals with things in different ways, there is no right or wrong way to feel.

A counsellor will try to help you cope with your feelings and develop ways of dealing with them.

You may have some or all of these feelings:

• Sadness
• Anxiety
• Anger
• Loss
• Loneliness.

Can I make my own appointment?

You can contact the hospital counsellor yourself (see contact numbers at the end of this leaflet) or your GP, doctor or healthcare professional can do this for you.

You may need to wait up to 2 – 4 weeks for your first appointment.

What will happen at my first appointment?

Meetings with your counsellor will usually last 50 minutes. You will be asked to talk about the feelings you are having.

It can be difficult talking about some things and may take some time before people talk freely and comfortably. You decide what you talk about and set the pace at your own speed.

The aim of the first meeting is for you and your counsellor to decide whether you may benefit from the kind of help a counsellor can offer. Counselling is not a “magic cure”, it may be that counselling is not for you.

How many appointments can I have?

This will be agreed by you and your counsellor. Meetings can be every week or 2 weeks and the number of sessions will depend on your needs. You are free to end sessions at any time.

Will what I say be confidential?

You can tell your counsellor things which will not be shared with anyone else. If your counsellor thinks you may hurt yourself or someone else, they would have to get help for you.

All appointments are confidential and any information about your discussions will not be shared without your consent (agreement). It is sometimes helpful to share some information with the person who made the referral and your GP.

If your counsellor believes you are at risk of harming yourself or anyone else, he or she has a duty to let someone now. In most cases this will be discussed with you first.

If you would like to discuss anything about the service or wish to speak to a counsellor in confidence, please see contact details overleaf.

Contact numbers

Please contact the counsellor at:

North Tees and Hartlepool NHS Foundation Trust

Telephone: 01642 624236

Monday – Friday, 9.00am – 5.00pm

Further information is available from:

Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society (SANDS)

28 Portland Place

London

W1B 1LY

Telephone: 0207 4365881

Monday – Friday, 9.30am – 5.30pm

Tuesday and Thursday, 6.00pm – 10.00pm

or via the website at www.uk-sands.org

The Miscarriage Association

17 Wentworth Terrace

Wakefield

WF1 3QW

Telephone: 01924 200799

Monday – Friday, 9.00am – 4.00pm

or via the website at www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk

CRUSE Bereavement Care

9 – 11 Harris Street

Middlesbrough

Cleveland

TS1 5EF

Telephone: 01642 210284

or via the website at www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk

MIND – The Mental Health Charity

Telephone: 01642 257020

or via the website at www.mind.org.uk

British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy BACP

BACP House

15 St Johns Business Park

Lutterworth

LE17 4HB

Telephone: 01455 883300

or via the website at http://www.bacp.co.uk

BLISS Bereavement of Premature Babies

Family Support Helpline

Freephone: 0500 618140 (10.00am – 10.00pm)

General Helpline: 0207 3781122 (9.00am – 5.30pm)

Child Bereavement Charity

Support and resources for bereaved parents and families

Helpline: 01494 568900

Email: [email protected]

Teesside Hospice Counselling Service

Bereavement Counselling and the ‘Forget Me Not’ service for children Telephone: 01642 811063 or 01642 811075

Comments, concerns, compliments or complaints

Patient Experience Team (PET)

We are continually trying to improve the services we provide. We want to know what we’re doing well or if there’s anything which we can improve, that’s why the Patient Experience Team (PET) is here to help. Our Patient Experience Team is here to try to resolve your concerns as quickly as possible. The office is based on the ground floor at the University Hospital of North Tees if you wish to discuss concerns in person. If you would like to contact or request a copy of our PET leaflet, please contact:

Telephone: 01642 624719

Freephone: 0800 092 0084

Opening hours: Monday to Friday, 9:30am to 4:00pm

Email: [email protected]

Out of hours

Out of hours if you wish to speak to a senior member of Trust staff, please contact the hospital switchboard who will bleep the appropriate person.

Telephone: 01642 617617

Data protection and use of patient information

The Trust has developed Data Protection policies in accordance with Data Protection Legislation (UK General Data Protection Regulations and Data Protection Act 2018) and the Freedom of Information Act 2000. All of our staff respect these policies and confidentiality is adhered to at all times. If you require further information on how we process your information please see our Privacy Notices.

Telephone: 01642 383551

Email: [email protected]

Leaflet feedback

This leaflet has been produced in partnership with patients and carers. All patient leaflets are regularly reviewed, and any suggestions you have as to how it may be improved are extremely valuable. Please write to the Clinical Governance team, North Tees and Hartlepool NHS Foundation Trust, University Hospital of North Tees, TS19 8PE or:

Email: [email protected]

Leaflet Reference: PIL1262
Date for Review: 30/09/2023