Counselling after the Loss of your Baby

This leaflet tells you about the support available to you after the loss of your baby. This could be through miscarriage, stillbirth, termination of pregnancy, ectopic pregnancy or sudden death of your child.

What is counselling?

Most people feel upset and sad at different times in their lives.  Usually they are able to cope, with time and help from family and friends.

However, you may find you are not able to cope by yourself and talking to someone independent (not family or friends) may help. This is called counselling. Losing your baby can be one of those difficult times, where counselling can help.

What is a counsellor?

A counsellor is someone who has training and experience in working with people who are going through a hard time in their life.

The hospital counsellor has special training in working with people who have lost their baby.

Why would I need to see a counsellor?

The hospital counsellor can see people if they are going through any of the situations below:

• Miscarriage
• Stillbirth
• Termination of pregnancy
• Ectopic pregnancy
• Sudden death of your child.

Everyone is different and deals with things in different ways, there is no right or wrong way to feel.

A counsellor will try to help you cope with your feelings and develop ways of dealing with them.

You may have some or all of these feelings:

• Sadness
• Anxiety
• Anger
• Loss
• Loneliness.

Can I make my own appointment?

You can contact the hospital counsellor yourself (see contact numbers at the end of this leaflet) or your GP, doctor or healthcare professional can do this for you. Your case will be reviewed to determine if the referral is appropriate.

We will aim to respond to calls within 48 hours.

You may need to wait up to 6 to 8 weeks for your first appointment. However, if the service is busy your wait may be up to 10 weeks.

What will happen at my first appointment?

Meetings with your counsellor will usually last 50 minutes. You will be asked to talk about the feelings you are having.

It can be difficult talking about some things and may take some time before people talk freely and comfortably. You decide what you talk about and set the pace at your own speed.

The aim of the first meeting is for you and your counsellor to decide whether you may benefit from the kind of help a counsellor can offer. Counselling is not a “magic cure”, it may be that counselling is not for you.

How many appointments can I have?

The usual number of appointments you will have is normally around 6, however, this will be agreed by you and your counsellor. Meetings can be every week or 2 weeks and the number of sessions will depend on your needs. You are free to end sessions at any time.

Will what I say be confidential?

You can tell your counsellor things which will not be shared with anyone else. If your counsellor thinks you may hurt yourself or someone else, they would have to get help for you.

All appointments are confidential and any information about your discussions will not be shared without your consent (agreement). It is sometimes helpful to share some information with the person who made the referral and your GP.

If your counsellor believes you are at risk of harming yourself or anyone else, he or she has a duty to let someone now. In most cases this will be discussed with you first.

If you would like to discuss anything about the service or wish to speak to a counsellor in confidence, please see contact details overleaf.

Contact numbers

Please contact the counsellor at:

North Tees and Hartlepool NHS Foundation Trust

Telephone: 01642 624236
Tuesday to Friday, 9.00am to 5.00pm

Further information is available from:

Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society (SANDS)

28 Portland Place
London
W1B 1LY
Telephone: 0207 4365881
Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 5.30pm
Tuesday and Thursday, 6.00pm to 10.00pm
or via the website at https://www.sands.org.uk/

The Miscarriage Association

17 Wentworth Terrace
Wakefield
WF1 3QW
Telephone: 01924 200799
Monday to Friday, 9.00am to 4.00pm
or via the website at www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk

CRUSE Bereavement Care

9 – 11 Harris Street
Middlesbrough
Cleveland
TS1 5EF
Telephone: 01642 210284
or via the website at www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk

MIND – The Mental Health Charity

Telephone: 01642 257020
or via the website at www.mind.org.uk

British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy BACP

BACP House
15 St Johns Business Park
Lutterworth
LE17 4HB
Telephone: 01455 883300
or via the website at http://www.bacp.co.uk

BLISS Bereavement of Premature Babies

Family Support Helpline
Freephone: 0500 618140 (10.00am –to10.00pm)
General Helpline: 0207 3781122 (9.00am to 5.30pm)

Child Bereavement Charity

Support and resources for bereaved parents and families
Helpline: 01494 568900
Email: [email protected]

Teesside Hospice Counselling Service

Bereavement Counselling and the ‘Forget Me Not’ service for children
Telephone: 01642 811063 or 01642 811075

Antenatal Results and Choices

Website: www.arc-uk.org

Child Bereavement

Website: www.childbereavementuk.org

Patient Experience Team (PET)

North Tees and Hartlepool NHS Foundation Trust would like your feedback. If you would like to share your experience about your care and treatment or on behalf of a patient, please contact The Patient Experience Team who will help you to do this.

This service is based at the University Hospital of North Tees but also covers the University Hospital of Hartlepool, our community hospitals and community health services.

North Tees and Hartlepool NHS Foundation Trust

Telephone: 01642 624719 / Freephone: 0800 092 0084

Email: [email protected]

Monday to Friday, 9:30 am to 4:00 pm

Out of hours if you wish to speak to a senior member of Trust staff, please contact the hospital switchboard (numbers below).

University Hospital of North Tees

Hardwick Road
Stockton-on-Tees
TS19 8PE
Telephone: 01642 617617

University Hospital of Hartlepool

Holdforth Road
Hartlepool
TS24 9AH
Telephone: 01642 617617

Leaflet Reference: PI046 version 1
Date for Review: 14 September 2029